what is happening that you need me to lie to children? please note that i have not said 'what have you done,' because despite history and logical conclusion i am placing my faith in you.
Okay well I made a cake and a friend so honestly you're right not to attack me. But okay, So I'm best friends with this guy who is basically my little brother. Actually, you know what? He's my little brother! Decree decreed. I love him very much but me and the other brother both think he's going to die if he sees a bra. Like literally a heart attack. We also decided some other stuff about how we (well, I) should stop freaking out so much because he's smart and emotionally attuned with himself and the girl he's seeing, and also I was threatened with like a really painful soul-eviscerating death when I sent them a safe sex book? But anyway I said I need to get a priest involved because you can talk to these wily premarital teens about premarital sex premaritally. HOWEVER, There is something that makes this complicated so are you keeping up so far?
Okay so I told Peter the other brother that we should get a priest involved or whatever, like that you, my priest friend, should read the safe sex book to Magnus (my baby bird brother-son). But Peter like the big stupid idiot he is went and told Magnus that I wanted to get a priest involved in this whole scene so now if you show up all priestily he'll know that I'm involved and he can't know that I'm involved or Alex will kill me again!! I mentioned it but Alex the girl threatened me with death if I ever delivered something sexy to them again? And, well, haha, you aren't sexy, but you're gonna be sex-talking this fool, and. I already broke this rule because I made a cake with an apology on it but IDK if that counts 'cause I'm still alive so...
Look basically here's what you have to do. You have three missions. One: Pretend you aren't a priest! Say you're a youth counsellor and you're just doing a door to door survey about like, Teen Abstinence or something. Magnus at least is too precious and sweet to have sex until he's like 400 and given that he's undead he can wait that long. Two: OBVIOUSLY PRETEND YOU DON'T KNOW ME. Pretend you're just some guy passing by or something. I don't know. You're smarter than me. You can come up with a plan. Three: BAIL IF YOU SEE ALEX. Alex is the really pretty genderfluid girl with the green hair with eyes that one might describe as being like fire but fire doesn't burn that savagely. You just need to talk to Magnus and Magnus alone. You're only to talk to Alex!!!!! FOURTH MISSION ACTUALLY: Maybe teach Magnus how to knit or something so he doesn't think about his boner anymore.
Oh also like I said he's undead so I don't know if STDs are a thing? Also um I don't think pregnancy is an issue. So focus on morals. Just morals. Shame him a lot until he's scared of boning down. But like in a nice way because I really love him and I don't want him to actually feel bad or ashamed about himself and I want him to have a healthy relationship even if that means having intimacy with the girl he loves who is smart and strong enough to take care of him even if I don't have faith in him to not totally suck at boning down. I know that sounds like a conflicting mindset for the missions I've set for you but that's something for you to sort out, not me.
GOD I LOVE YOU SO MUCH YOU'RE EVERYTHING TO ME YOU'RE THE WORLD TO ME PLEASE MAKE THIS RIGHT
It turns out I already feel weird about this and am prickling with guilt and shame and am worried about what this will mean for my relationships with Magnus and Peter if either of us screws this up so I guess what I'm saying is don't screw up? I'm not saying don't do it I'm just when you sprout the wings of chaos you need to keep them outstretched, do not just rely on a single feather here
i will do what i can, odin, but i do wish to cover a few points before i do.
i am doing this for you, despite trepidation, because you have been through a very difficult time in that house and i do not believe you are handling it as you should. i fear you are struggling, and this is a distraction, or perhaps helping your 'brothers' will bring you some measure of peace. it is understandable and, perhaps, honorable. but it will not fix the core of the issue. please take care of yourself.
secondly, while i will do so if you wish it i must suggest against deception, especially to family. all the good intentions in the world cannot fix misunderstandings and mistakes made in such a way.
[ so yeah, spoilers, pucci's right about literally everything he just said ]
And - sorry. I'm an idiot. I should have known better to bring up family in... this kind of context? A now-I'm-causing-a-bad-relationship-kind-of-context? Sorry. Man, I'm screwing up all over the place. Okay, whaaaaaaat iiiiiiiiif weeeeeeee don't do any of this even though in my 4AM insomniac delusionary delusional delusion mind I still think it's a very good idea despite all the faults and the flaws? If I'm struggling I don't want to ruin other people's happiness or relationships or anything else like that which I guess is maybe what I'm doing probably.
i understand, odin. should you need to in the future i hope you know i would be glad to listen.
no need to apologize, it is simply advice. i would feel remiss to not give it, how you use it is your prerogative. now, perhaps the first course of action should be working out why this concerns you so. this younger brother of yours, do you truly believe he cannot work this out and learn for himself? what exactly is it that troubles you about this venture of his?
He's pure and beautiful and sweet and kind and I love him. I don't want him to get hurt! Ever! And I know Alex won't hurt him because she's
[ okay well he can't use any of those adjectives for alex and he wouldn't even if he knew her better. um. Uh ]
Magnus is smart and he won't get hurt because he wouldn't date someone who would hurt him. But I don't want anyone I care about to get hurt and I keep getting scared it'll happen even though it's not any of my business and I'm being a nosy nosy punkass nosy noserer. I don't know what to do with all of these emotions because I can't run at him screaming about how I want him to be safe and happy and good because I want to give him some space and not yell at him about all my feelings. But he's a sunshine boy. He's a sunshine flower rose bird boy.
you must accept that there will always be the chance of him getting hurt, my friend. it is unfortunate but it is the price of living. we cannot know what fate has in store. but now, with interference, you may hurt him without meaning to. even with the best intentions, sometimes protecting those we love in such a way has a terrible cost.
have you spoken with him candidly about this, odin? what you have just told me now, the core of your fears for him.
Ugh, fate is the worst! I hate fate so much! I wish there were a way for me to know what my fate is before it happened. That way I'd be able to emotionally prepare before things got real.
[ Well ]
I mean okay, I love fate, actually. The dark shadowy black billowing cloak that burdens me. The path in my stars etched out for a hero of my calibre. I get it. But. Mehhhngmhamhemhemenngmgamhghgmmhmhnggggggghhmmmmmm.
And no. I haven't. Not really. Because I know I'll either annoy him and I don't want to do that, or he'll tell me I'm worrying about nothing and successfully reassure me that everything's okay and render me unable to distract myself with his relationship. So.
there are other ways to distract yourself, if you are not prepared to face your troubles at this time. though, odin, running from them will only give them time to fester. this is a trial, one you are more than capable of overcoming. you know what is best for your friend is to talk to him. in the end, as you have done before, you will do the right thing. i believe that is your fate.
I guess I could keep working on my project with Hermes, but... I don't know. I don't even feel good writing anymore. Sorry. I don't know. I shouldn't be doing this to him. Or to you, for that matter. I'll figure something out, or else lose my spine again and ask you to go through with the plan regardless of my Right Now feelings.
Thanks for talking to me about this and also I guess about fate? Catholicism sure is a wild ride.
if you need you may come stay with me, or i with you. i am concerned and believe company may do you good. just let me know ahead of time, i am often out in the evening.
you need not apologize, and i wish you will however this will go. i shall wait for your word on this.
what project with hermes costello are you speaking of?
I might come over, if I can bring the dogs. I don't know... I'll think about it. Oh! But where do you go in the evening? I thought priests didn't have boyfriends. Huehueheuhehehehehehe.
Oh, shit. Uh.
[ five minutes pass while Odin struggles to find a lie ]
I didn't say Hermes Costello. I said Hermes. Hermes is the name of one of my dogs? (Did I tell you the names of my dogs already?)
i spend time with an old friend. he has a difficult schedule to work around, i'm afraid, so late evening works best.
you did tell me the names of your dogs, odin. i am glad you are making friends with hermes costello. i will refrain from asking of this mysterious project if you do not wish to speak of it. just do not end up in prison.
Whaaaat! Whaaaaaaaaaaaaat!!! You didn't tell me you had an old friend here! I thought you were alone from your world. Well, except for Hermes. Tell me literally everything about him, please.
Okay, yes, I promise I won't end up in prison (at least not as a result from this particular adventure.) I'm making you a present and she's helping me. That's all!
he is something of a private individual, so i usually refrain from mentioning him. but yes, he and hermes costello are the only i personally know. there are a few others from the same universe as us, i believe. as for what he's like i would describe him as a man loved by God. he is quite the visionary. i am grateful he is here.
please do not end up in prison at all, odin. well that is alarming, but i will reserve judgment and hope for the best. have you been enjoying her company?
Wow, you're making him sound like a king or something. My aunt was a king, but I guess by king I mean queen and by queen I mean Exalt. She was loving and kind and fair. Everything I know about her indicates she was loved by God, too. I guess? I don't really get anything you just said but I'm pretending that I do so that we can continue having a conversation. How'd you guys meet?
Oh, and yeah, she's really funny. Hermes. She has an innate understanding of the sexual characteristics one man might feel towards another man, even when one of those men is undead and in a dress. It is a useful skill, but I can't tell you any more about it.
it's amusing you should put it that way. yes, i imagine such a woman would be very loved by god. those who can lead humanity to great heights are. it was a very long time ago, when i was still a teenager. we met in church, by chance. i tripped over him, actually. funny how gravity choses to bring people together, literally in some cases.
odin.
nevermind. i'm sure i'll learn more about that comment soon enough.
Hey, so also what's your deal with gravity and stuff? This is like the third or fourth time you've mentioned how gravity is magic. I didn't realize that gravity was magic? I only sort of understand what it is, even. Science is hard and I don't understand it.
it's a concept my friend introduced me to, or perhaps it's truer to say he helped change my thoughts on fate. in scientific terms gravity is the phenomena of mass being pulled towards mass. in more philosophical terms, as my dear friend often tells it, that pull exists between people as well. have you wondered why we were brought together as we were, odin? two people from universes far apart, occupations and ideals greatly different, lives vasty separate and yet you are now a great friend. why were we chosen for this? why were we taken the same month, ran into each other the same times, ended up where we are now?
i believe gravity drew us together, an plan so vast it is impossible to see. just like how i tripped over my friend that day, and found him again here.
![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
no subject
what is happening that you need me to lie to children?
please note that i have not said 'what have you done,' because despite history and logical conclusion i am placing my faith in you.
no subject
But okay,
So I'm best friends with this guy who is basically my little brother. Actually, you know what? He's my little brother! Decree decreed.
I love him very much but me and the other brother both think he's going to die if he sees a bra. Like literally a heart attack.
We also decided some other stuff about how we (well, I) should stop freaking out so much because he's smart and emotionally attuned with himself and the girl he's seeing, and also I was threatened with like a really painful soul-eviscerating death when I sent them a safe sex book?
But anyway I said I need to get a priest involved because you can talk to these wily premarital teens about premarital sex premaritally.
HOWEVER,
There is something that makes this complicated so are you keeping up so far?
no subject
no subject
But Peter like the big stupid idiot he is went and told Magnus that I wanted to get a priest involved in this whole scene so now if you show up all priestily he'll know that I'm involved and he can't know that I'm involved or Alex will kill me again!!
I mentioned it but Alex the girl threatened me with death if I ever delivered something sexy to them again? And, well, haha, you aren't sexy, but you're gonna be sex-talking this fool, and.
I already broke this rule because I made a cake with an apology on it but IDK if that counts 'cause I'm still alive so...
Look basically here's what you have to do.
You have three missions.
One: Pretend you aren't a priest! Say you're a youth counsellor and you're just doing a door to door survey about like, Teen Abstinence or something. Magnus at least is too precious and sweet to have sex until he's like 400 and given that he's undead he can wait that long.
Two: OBVIOUSLY PRETEND YOU DON'T KNOW ME. Pretend you're just some guy passing by or something. I don't know. You're smarter than me. You can come up with a plan.
Three: BAIL IF YOU SEE ALEX. Alex is the really pretty genderfluid girl with the green hair with eyes that one might describe as being like fire but fire doesn't burn that savagely. You just need to talk to Magnus and Magnus alone. You're only to talk to Alex!!!!!
FOURTH MISSION ACTUALLY: Maybe teach Magnus how to knit or something so he doesn't think about his boner anymore.
Oh also like I said he's undead so I don't know if STDs are a thing?
Also um I don't think pregnancy is an issue.
So focus on morals.
Just morals.
Shame him a lot until he's scared of boning down.
But like in a nice way because I really love him and I don't want him to actually feel bad or ashamed about himself and I want him to have a healthy relationship even if that means having intimacy with the girl he loves who is smart and strong enough to take care of him even if I don't have faith in him to not totally suck at boning down.
I know that sounds like a conflicting mindset for the missions I've set for you but that's something for you to sort out, not me.
1/2
no subject
no subject
It turns out I already feel weird about this and am prickling with guilt and shame and am worried about what this will mean for my relationships with Magnus and Peter if either of us screws this up so
I guess what I'm saying is don't screw up?
I'm not saying don't do it I'm just when you sprout the wings of chaos you need to keep them outstretched, do not just rely on a single feather here
no subject
i am doing this for you, despite trepidation, because you have been through a very difficult time in that house and i do not believe you are handling it as you should.
i fear you are struggling, and this is a distraction, or perhaps helping your 'brothers' will bring you some measure of peace.
it is understandable and, perhaps, honorable. but it will not fix the core of the issue.
please take care of yourself.
secondly, while i will do so if you wish it i must suggest against deception, especially to family.
all the good intentions in the world cannot fix misunderstandings and mistakes made in such a way.
no subject
[ so yeah, spoilers, pucci's right about literally everything he just said ]
And - sorry. I'm an idiot. I should have known better to bring up family in... this kind of context? A now-I'm-causing-a-bad-relationship-kind-of-context?
Sorry.
Man, I'm screwing up all over the place.
Okay, whaaaaaaat iiiiiiiiif weeeeeeee don't do any of this even though in my 4AM insomniac delusionary delusional delusion mind I still think it's a very good idea despite all the faults and the flaws?
If I'm struggling I don't want to ruin other people's happiness or relationships or anything else like that which I guess is maybe what I'm doing probably.
no subject
no need to apologize, it is simply advice.
i would feel remiss to not give it, how you use it is your prerogative.
now, perhaps the first course of action should be working out why this concerns you so.
this younger brother of yours, do you truly believe he cannot work this out and learn for himself?
what exactly is it that troubles you about this venture of his?
no subject
I don't want him to get hurt! Ever! And I know Alex won't hurt him because she's
[ okay well he can't use any of those adjectives for alex and he wouldn't even if he knew her better. um. Uh ]
Magnus is smart and he won't get hurt because he wouldn't date someone who would hurt him.
But I don't want anyone I care about to get hurt and I keep getting scared it'll happen even though it's not any of my business and I'm being a nosy nosy punkass nosy noserer.
I don't know what to do with all of these emotions because I can't run at him screaming about how I want him to be safe and happy and good because I want to give him some space and not yell at him about all my feelings.
But he's a sunshine boy.
He's a sunshine flower rose bird boy.
no subject
it is unfortunate but it is the price of living. we cannot know what fate has in store.
but now, with interference, you may hurt him without meaning to.
even with the best intentions, sometimes protecting those we love in such a way has a terrible cost.
have you spoken with him candidly about this, odin?
what you have just told me now, the core of your fears for him.
no subject
I wish there were a way for me to know what my fate is before it happened. That way I'd be able to emotionally prepare before things got real.
[ Well ]
I mean okay, I love fate, actually. The dark shadowy black billowing cloak that burdens me. The path in my stars etched out for a hero of my calibre. I get it.
But.
Mehhhngmhamhemhemenngmgamhghgmmhmhnggggggghhmmmmmm.
And no. I haven't. Not really.
Because I know I'll either annoy him and I don't want to do that, or he'll tell me I'm worrying about nothing and successfully reassure me that everything's okay and render me unable to distract myself with his relationship.
So.
no subject
[ γ΄γ΄γ΄γ΄γ΄γ΄γ΄γ΄ ]
there are other ways to distract yourself, if you are not prepared to face your troubles at this time.
though, odin, running from them will only give them time to fester.
this is a trial, one you are more than capable of overcoming.
you know what is best for your friend is to talk to him. in the end, as you have done before, you will do the right thing.
i believe that is your fate.
no subject
I don't know. I don't even feel good writing anymore.
Sorry. I don't know. I shouldn't be doing this to him. Or to you, for that matter.
I'll figure something out, or else lose my spine again and ask you to go through with the plan regardless of my Right Now feelings.
Thanks for talking to me about this and also I guess about fate?
Catholicism sure is a wild ride.
no subject
just let me know ahead of time, i am often out in the evening.
you need not apologize, and i wish you will however this will go.
i shall wait for your word on this.
what project with hermes costello are you speaking of?
no subject
I don't know... I'll think about it.
Oh! But where do you go in the evening?
I thought priests didn't have boyfriends. Huehueheuhehehehehehe.
Oh, shit. Uh.
[ five minutes pass while Odin struggles to find a lie ]
I didn't say Hermes Costello. I said Hermes.
Hermes is the name of one of my dogs?
(Did I tell you the names of my dogs already?)
no subject
he has a difficult schedule to work around, i'm afraid, so late evening works best.
you did tell me the names of your dogs, odin.
i am glad you are making friends with hermes costello.
i will refrain from asking of this mysterious project if you do not wish to speak of it.
just do not end up in prison.
no subject
Whaaaaaaaaaaaaat!!!
You didn't tell me you had an old friend here! I thought you were alone from your world. Well, except for Hermes.
Tell me literally everything about him, please.
Okay, yes, I promise I won't end up in prison (at least not as a result from this particular adventure.)
I'm making you a present and she's helping me.
That's all!
no subject
but yes, he and hermes costello are the only i personally know. there are a few others from the same universe as us, i believe.
as for what he's like i would describe him as a man loved by God.
he is quite the visionary. i am grateful he is here.
please do not end up in prison at all, odin.
well that is alarming, but i will reserve judgment and hope for the best.
have you been enjoying her company?
no subject
My aunt was a king, but I guess by king I mean queen and by queen I mean Exalt. She was loving and kind and fair.
Everything I know about her indicates she was loved by God, too. I guess?
I don't really get anything you just said but I'm pretending that I do so that we can continue having a conversation.
How'd you guys meet?
Oh, and yeah, she's really funny. Hermes.
She has an innate understanding of the sexual characteristics one man might feel towards another man, even when one of those men is undead and in a dress.
It is a useful skill, but I can't tell you any more about it.
no subject
yes, i imagine such a woman would be very loved by god. those who can lead humanity to great heights are.
it was a very long time ago, when i was still a teenager. we met in church, by chance.
i tripped over him, actually.
funny how gravity choses to bring people together, literally in some cases.
odin.
nevermind.
i'm sure i'll learn more about that comment soon enough.
no subject
[ wait, priest, priest. ]
Hey, so also what's your deal with gravity and stuff?
This is like the third or fourth time you've mentioned how gravity is magic.
I didn't realize that gravity was magic? I only sort of understand what it is, even.
Science is hard and I don't understand it.
no subject
it's a concept my friend introduced me to, or perhaps it's truer to say he helped change my thoughts on fate.
in scientific terms gravity is the phenomena of mass being pulled towards mass.
in more philosophical terms, as my dear friend often tells it, that pull exists between people as well.
have you wondered why we were brought together as we were, odin?
two people from universes far apart, occupations and ideals greatly different, lives vasty separate and yet you are now a great friend.
why were we chosen for this? why were we taken the same month, ran into each other the same times, ended up where we are now?
i believe gravity drew us together, an plan so vast it is impossible to see. just like how i tripped over my friend that day, and found him again here.
1/2
[ :D ]
(no subject)